I’ve been talking to some friends about coping with Christmas. Listening to the radio too where this was discussed, I know I’m not the only one who loathes the whole direction Christmas celebrations have taken. It appears to have nothing to do with the Christian feast, not even with the pagan winter solstice but everything to do with mass consumerism.

Although I’m an atheist, I remember my Catholic upbringing in the Netherlands. Christmas was a low key affair. We went to church a lot, a few people had a Christmas tree and my mother cooked a chicken on the day. Children received presents on St Nicholas Eve (5 Dec), only from their parents. Nobody bought for other family members or for friends.

I note that people feel obligated towards those who give to them. Reciprocity should be free and willing, not cause guilt. Somebody on the radio explained how their family had started ‘Secret Santa’ and yet there was one member who insisted on buying something for everyone, very disrespectful. Already struggling families get sucked into this madness, many of them getting into debt.

I understand people like to give. But there are many different ways in which we can be generous. We can be generous with our time, for instance by helping at a homeless charity, visiting a lonely person, making a phone call to someone you know who’s not in good health, taking some home baked mince pies to a busy family, etc.

If you really feel the need to buy presents, why not buy a membership to a charity, what about a pot with some soil and a seed packet for a child. Children adore the wonder of seeing a plant grow from something so tiny, a true miracle.

The one wonderful thing I love about this time of year is that the days start to lengthen again with the solstice on 21 December. What better sign to beckon you outside. If you’re lonely or need encouragement, join Parkrun, you don’t need to be fit. There are Parkruns even on Christmas day, including in Aberystwyth, the Teifi Marshes in Cardigan, and Milford Waterfront in Milford Haven, and it’s free.

In this dark time with wars raging in many places, it’s hard to be positive. We all hope for peace. I like to think I do my bit arguing for a less unequal society as those are shown to be happier ones. Hopelessness brings forth apathy but locally there are always things we can do. A prime shining light is Ahmet Acikel who is opening his Home Café again, offering Christmas Dinner to the homeless and lonely in Aberystwyth.

Here are some ideas for the New Year that may lift your spirits. Grow some of your own vegetables, even some salad leaves in a pot on the windowsill will bring you joy. Leave the car at home for shorter journeys, try walking or cycling or catching the bus instead. Cook some fresh vegetables, just a simple tasty soup will warm your heart. Spend less time on your screen, engage more with friends and family in person. Join a charity or volunteer for a few hours in a charity shop, what a great way to make friends. Read a book, a few pages a day can keep the blues at bay, and the library is free. Take something to a repair café, we have them in Aberystwyth, Aberaeron, New Quay and St Dogmaels to name just a few.

Forget about writing all those Christmas cards, get on the phone and find out how your friends are. Hearing their voices is the most uplifting thing.